Choosing the Name Free Childhood

I came up with the name Free Childhood pretty easily and the reason being that’s what I feel my mission is.  I think childhood is in danger these days.  Many people might look at me like I’m crazy when I say that.  People probably think our kids have it so good.  They are coddled, spoiled, life is very easy for them.  What I would say those people are not considering is that an integral part of childhood is exploration.  All animals take risks during childhood, play with some element of danger (key word being play) so that they can practice what they will do as adults.  We have stripped our human children of that right.  They are spending all of their time in either adult led activities or on a screen.  I think my generation, children of the 80s, are the last generation of kids who really got to explore, play, go out on their own a bit and that’s a huge problem for the generations who came later.  If kids are not given opportunities to discover, what happens to them?  It’s like parents today want to protect their kids so fiercely they would wrap them in bubble wrap and have them sit on the couch all day but we need to look at real risks versus the almost impossible what ifs. 

Real Risks of Over Restriction

Your child is at great risk of not knowing who they are when they are adults or what makes them happy.

Your child is at great risk of obesity, diabetes and depression.  Rates of these three illnesses have skyrocketed in children over the last few decades.

 Your child is at great risk of having little to no social skills and will have great problems forming strong relationships.

Your child is at great risk of losing the creativity, imagination and genuine love of learning all babies are programmed with when they are born.  These three components of the amazing human brain are survival skills for babies but are quickly diminished more and more as we go through life always being told what and how to do everything.

Your child is connecting with strangers of any age and mental health status through their video games and hearing inappropriate messaging.

Almost Impossible What Ifs:

These are the fears parents are so focused on that they structure many of their child’s life decisions around them and yet the statistics of these situations arising are so low that if you looked up real data on them you would find they are as close to as impossible as say being run over by a hippo.

Your child is abducted by a stranger for any reason such as kidnapping, sex trading, etc.

Your child is given poisonous candy.

I actually can’t think of any others right now therefore, parents are so focused on stranger danger that they harm their children in countless other ways to avoid this thing that never happens.  Yes, there have been cases of child abduction.  They are also extremely rare and are ALWAYS someone the child knows, usually a family member.  I can say that because the real statistic is 0.1% and that came from FBI data (2019).  We teach our children to be so fearful of strangers- who are usually their neighbors and community members that if our children ever found themselves in a situation where they did need help they would of course need to rely on their technology. There are so many reasons why that is sad!

Parents are afraid

This is the main reason why kids are not getting out and playing

Another huge issue is the overscheduling of children.  Again, this strips kids of the right to have time to play and just be kids.  We take them from a very structured, adult led school day straight home to quickly do their homework and then off to their numerous after school activities.  These activities are all highly structured.  Instead of having time with friends to come up with games of their own fruition, to resolve their own conflicts, and learn how to navigate social situations they are again in a highly structured, adult led activity.  This is typically followed by screen time to “relax” and this cycle is on rinse and repeat day after day. 

            I hear three main reasons why parents want their children to have activities for almost every single day following school:

·      It keeps them safe

·      My kids are overactive and need structured activities as much as possible

·      It is good for them to be involved and learn all of these skills

My Kids Need Structure or They’re Crazy!

For those parents that believe their children are overactive and therefore need to burn energy in structured environments as much as possible, your child probably seems overactive because they never get the freedom to express themselves as children.  Whether these activities are fun or not nothing replaces children being given the freedom to have their own agency without an adult micromanaging every action they do on a field, classroom or any other setting.  Also, the amount of screen time your child has is probably a direct correlation to how “overactive” they seem. 

Being On a Team is Good For Them!

The last point is true but has been taken to an extreme in the past couple of decades.  Yes, it is wonderful for your child to be exposed to many extracurriculars. This may guide them in discovering a path that excites them. With that said, youth sports used to be a once a week thing and is now daily with several games on the weekend. Children as young as three are involved in numerous activities committing them most evenings of the week. We are seeing a huge rise in overuse injuries in children and it is scary. At this rate most of these kids will need hip and knee replacements before they hit forty.  We are wearing our kids out and the pressure to have your kids involved to this degree is felt by most parents in this country.

Why do parents of this generation believe their children will not be active if they are not scheduled for structured activities? What happened to kids playing sports in the street? Pretending and acting in their rooms? Doing art projects at the table?  Why is it that they have to be in theater, attending a studio and on semi pro teams?  When did it happen that if kids are at home the only choice is electronics? As it has been well documented, screens are harmful, overstimulating, addictive and host a myriad of problems.  While it may benefit your child from time to time to attend some of these places hosted by adults they are capable of more than you realize when given the space and time to just be creative with their peers.

So, yes, I do believe we are stealing their childhood. Their opportunities to be the pure, creative little beings they entered this world as ready to explore and seek their own adventures.  We are giving them jobs with long hours and making them listen to adults around the clock.  We are even taking away their time to rest, be bored, come up with their own ideas and wonderings.  The thing is they often won’t complain as they are humans and humans are built for adaptation.  We will adapt to whatever environment we are dropped in. We may see signs that the conditions are not optimal but these can often be ignored.  It is easy to trick our minds into believing we are on the right track and this is all beneficial but I hope that more will join me on the crusade to Free Childhood! I would hate for Chloe to be the only free child out there- who would she play with?